What's Your Plan?

Now that I am living back in California and seeing lots of people I haven't seen in a while, everyone seems to want to know the same thing...what's my plan?

A plan is such a tricky thing, isn't it? Back when I was with child, I didn't know how I would feel about staying home. Because of this, I was perfectly fine with the idea of going back to work. Then this adorable lttle guy came along and I was never the same.

The thought of abandoning leaving him and going back to work seemed awful. I kept getting sick to my stomach when I was actually talking to Starbucks about going back. Alas, that never happened and we ended up in California...the place where everyone seems to want to know what my plan is.

The truth is, I don't have much of a plan. I really do love staying at home with Connor. I pretty much think it is the life. But, for some reason, I feel so awkward telling people that I am staying at home. It makes me feel like people think I am a loser, a mooch, not driven. I know that isn't true. But it is I feel. I don't want to feel that way. In fact, I realize there are all sorts of people who wish they too were in the position to stay at home with their kiddos. So really, I should be talking about how blessed I am and not complaining about my feelings.

But back to my plan. If there was a job that really got my heart racing, I would consider doing it part time, but that is it. Part time. My time with Connor is much too precious for me to give it up.

Now I just need to get over myself and get to the point that I can admit to others that I spend my days with a one-year-old and freaking love it.