Love

Today is a little something that Ian and I like to refer to as our anniversary. On this day 7 years ago, we got married...awww.

With every passing day since then, it seems that we have fallen more in love with each other and enjoying our time together more and more.

Let me tell you a little story. This story takes place on Friday, May 7, 1999. Ian was dropping me off at home after us going out on a date. He pulls into my driveway and leans in for what I think is a hug. Then, quickly (like literally it lasted all of 2 seconds) gave me a kiss. I stumbled out of the car wondering what happened. As soon as he was out of my driveway, I was on the phone to my friends. They quickly came over and we reenacted what just happened...without the actual kiss though.

Fast forward to today, now Ian is that person who I talk to about everything. Sure there are less reenactments (okay, so really NO reenactments), but I can always talk to him about everything going on. He is my best friend and the person I feel totally and completely comfortable around.

We've come a long way baby! Here are some photos from our dating years:






Connor Got His Hair Cut!

Connor got his first haircut on Saturday. He did great during it. And the lady cutting his hair did a great job as well. He sat on Ian's lap. The hair lady was nice and let him play with her comb and stuff. She even had a little hair cutting apron (is that what you call them?) for him to wear. It was so cute. She trimmed his bangs, around his ears and the top. He was very curious when she trimmed his bangs, so we gave him Ian's phone to play with so he would stop grabbing for the scissors.

I had said before hand that I wanted to keep a lock of Connor's hair. Ian thought I was a freak for wanting to do that. Then, after the hair lady did the first cut, she asked me if I wanted it...I was like HA Ian, I am not such a freak after all!

Here are some pics of Connor getting his first haircut:

The first cut




The finished product

Simple Pleasures


Connor watching the rain from the front door...it won't be for much longer that he will just sit there like that!

Connor, the Food Man

Connor really does love food. Apparently, it is what he has been waiting his whole life for! So far, he hasn't met a food he didn't like. Though, for some reason, he seems much more eager to eat veggies than fruits, which I am proud of. Also, he doesn't seem to like cold things. Any drink that is cold, he won't drink...though if the same drink is room temperature, he is all for it. Kind of funny, but I guess we all have our "things".

Here is a video from yesterday of Connor trying squash for the first time. He seems to like it and ate all of it, so well done Connor!

video

On a side note, I preferred the "milk only" poops to the "food" poops. Yes, the food poops are easier to clean up, but they stink and I don't like that!

I am Conceited

Normally I don't compare myself to others. I just think it is a bad place to go. Trying to keep up with the Jones' or comparing my body to others...its just not good. I accept me for me and I accept my life for what it is. My body and my life are a reflection of the choices I make. 'Nuff said.

However, that doesn't mean I don't do a little comparing from time to time. Let me tell you a story that happened today...

Whenever I see people with babies, I always look at them and see if they are around Connor's age. Why it matters? I don't really know. But sometimes if people are alone and have a baby around Connor's age, I will talk to them.

So here I am, walking along today. I see two ladies pushing their babies in their strollers. I look at the babies and they look around Connor's age. As I am walking past them (I am known for being a fast walker) I hear them talking. Lady 1 says to lady 2 that she hasn't lost all her baby weight and that she probably never will be able to. Lady 2 says that she hasn't either, but is still trying.

Being the conceited person that I am, I wanted to stop and tell those ladies that I had lost all my baby weight plus 11 pounds. That's kind of mean right?

Though really, I worked decently hard to do that, so I am proud. And for saying this I will probably gain tons of weight with my next pregnancy and never be able to loose it!

Faith

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Hebrews 11:1

I've been thinking about things a lot lately, thinking about God. When I start thinking and searching, I realize that all my beliefs are based on faith. When you think about it, that really is a tall order...believing in something that there is really no evidence for.

For a very long time, I had a child-like faith. I never questioned, I just believed. Even now, I really don't question, I just wonder. And I actually notice, the more I wonder, the more questions I come up with.

Most of my questions aren't even deep. They more deal with life after death and how things will be in heaven...I mean, just thinking about eternity boggles my mind! I am curious about the makeup of our world...good vs. evil. What happens when we pray? Like, what goes on behind the scenes to determine an answered prayer versus and unanswered prayer. I believe that God answers prayers, but I also believe we live in a fallen world. So, is there some sort of spiritual battle going on when we pray?

One thing I am really intrigued by is how Jesus lived his life. When I read the bible, I kind of get the idea that he was a bit of a hippy. He did what he wanted. He hung out with who he wanted. He had a backbone. He stood up for himself, yet he accepted his lot in life. He had genius things to say, yet said them in common terms. We have a lot to learn from him.

I've always believed that my greatest way to witness to those around me is by how I live. I don't say this as a cop out. In fact, I am more than willing to talk about my beliefs with people. But, I realize many of my friends know my beliefs and don't want to talk about it. So, to me I think that means I keep on loving them as always and hope that eventually they will want to talk.

Faith, it is so complicated for being such a simple word. And even though I like the sound of Hebrews 11:1, it kind of baffles my mind. How can something that is in a sense a feeling, a thought be considered substance and evidence?

It all baffles my little mind.

A Taste of Summer

Connor got to try his first ice pop this weekend. Given that he is liking cold things in his mouth lately (can we say "bring on the teeth"), I decided to give it a try. He immediately put it in his mouth, but didn't exactly look excited. He just kept pulling it out, looking at it, then putting it back in his mouth. When I took it away from him, he freaked out...obviously he did like it.

I gave him another one today and being the bright child that he is, he managed to get it out of the plastic. I let him play with it another few minutes until he broke it up into pieces. Really, I did this for my own entertainment. It was so slippery that it took all his might to pick it up and then as soon as he would get it to his mouth, it would slip out of his little hand again. It was funny...probably at his expense though!

Checking out his ice pop


Liar

Did you ever notice that we all stretch the truth? We all lie. I was raised with the belief that

the intent to deceive is a lie.

And adults used to love it when I would bring up that they lied to me about something! They would deny it until I stuck that line on them!

I think we all fall into one of two types of liars:

1. Over exaggerator
2. Under exaggerator

Oh well, I guess there are three...there are also people who just lie for the sake of lying. But I am not talking about those people today. I am more dealing with the general public.

As an over exaggerator, you always have problems. In fact, your life is always worse than everyone else's. And, whenever someone is going thru something, you are the person who has to tell a story of something worse that happened to you.

Then there are the under exaggerators. You are the people who act like your life is perfect, when it is really falling apart. Nothing is a big deal. When someone tells you a story, you look at them like they are crazy because since your life is perfect, you have never been thru anything like that before!

My opinion...there are positives and negatives to both types. Its good to over exaggerate for a story. It gets more laughs that way and most people do it. Yet, it isn't cool to always have to top everyone else's stories. That is just plain annoying. As for under exaggerating, when you act like your life is perfect, you are making others just feel even more imperfect. I understand not sharing every detail of your life with perfect strangers, but when someone is hanging their heart out there for you, at least try to act like you can relate!

Anyway, I have discovered that over and under exaggerations take place every freaking second of the day when talking to other parents. You either have perfect babies or they never stop crying. Why can't it be in the middle?!? Why can't we all admit that there are good days and there are bad days? Why can't we encourage a fellow parent when their child is have a bad day rather than trying to 1. top their story or 2. tell them our child is perfect? It doesn't help anyone.

We shouldn't be trying to tear each other down. We should be trying to encourage one another and build each other up. Come on people...

No more exaggerations!!!

Well, unless it is for a good story!

Sleep

I have decided, it is time for me to sleep like a baby...and I mean that in a good way!

I have trouble sleeping. Chalk it up to being a night owl or whatever you want to call it, but I have trouble getting to sleep at night. It has become the norm for me to be up until at least 2am. And this isn't because I want to be. No. I would much rather be sleeping. But every night seems like torture. I just can't get myself to go to sleep.

Then something occurred to me.

They say that when babies are over tired, it takes them much longer to get to sleep. This is the same with me. Every evening I seem to go thru the same pattern. During the evening (say around 10ish) I get tired. But, I don't go to bed. Instead I stay up. I hang out with Ian or watch tv or something. Then, by the time we are heading to bed, I am wide awake. And so the nightly cycle begins.

I think my problem is staying up too late. I am allowing myself to go past the point of no return. Thus getting no sleep. So I have decided, it is time.

It is time to take the advice they give us parents about our babies...put them to bed before they get tired! So that's it. I need to get to bed before I get to the point of no return, before I cross over to the dark side and am no longer tired.

I mean, honestly, why do I force myself to stay up when I am tired anyway?!? Only problem is, what happens when I get tired at 8pm?

Hmmm...

7 Months


Weight: 17 lbs

Accomplishments:
Crawled backwards
Finds everything he isn't supposed to play with...and plays with it anyway!
Sleeping thru the night (mostly)
Puts everything in his mouth
"Grabs" at things printed on fabric
Cuddles with his "blanket buddy" at night
Reaches out and stops his baby swing by holding the frame
Smiling/responding to people on video chat

New Experiences:
Swing
Slide
Movies (at the theater)
Different foods (carrots, sweet potato, peas, etc.)
Got a library card

I get so much joy watching Connor discover new things. Watching him follow a bird flying in the sky or staring at a baby that is crying. Grabbing for my cup or cuddling with his "blanket buddy". I feel like he changes so fast. What he liked last week, he doesn't like this week. And what he couldn't do last week, he now does it this week. I feel so fortunate to be around him, watching him grow and change and become his own little person.



I just can't resist a good bath picture!





Connor loves sucking on apple cores

Weekend Update

Awww, old school Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live...oh how I miss thee! But that isn't the point of this post!

We had a good weekend over here on our side of the world.
Thought you would like to know.

The Good:

A BBQ at someone's house from our church.
Connor laughing whenever I laugh.
Catching up on Scrubs.
Grocery shopping...our cupboards were seriously lacking!
Coffee.
Discovering the worlds funniest website.
Starbucks.
Talking on the phone to people I love.
Catching up with people via email.
A girlie movie.

The Bad:

Ian being out of town All Weekend.
My neighbor being so noisy that she woke Connor up at 11pm.
My Caramel Macchiato from Starbucks tasting burnt.
Laundry, laundry and more laundry.
Rain and cold weather.

And thankfully no ugly!

Overall, it was a good weekend.
But then again, how can you have a bad weekend when you are raising the cutest child on the planet?!?

How was your weekend?
Hope it was swell.

And here's a little video for you...just to show you how riveting my weekend was! Actually, I think it's cute to see Connor's chubby little finger spinning the wheel on his Tonka truck!

video

Painful

I HATE the beds in our house. They are stupidly designed. They have this stupidly placed 2 inch lip completely around the bed. And, it is at just the right place that you (well, I) constantly smack your shins into them...and always at full speed....this causing way too much pain!

Then there is the fact that our landlord originally told us she would take the bed out of Connor's room only to change her mind once we moved in. So, we are stuck with a room with way too much furniture, a person who is overly accident prone (me) and two shins who have been beat beyond recognition.

BOTH shins in one week! That's just not nice!


You can't tell from the picture (some great quality ones from my iphone!) but my right shin is all swollen and it hurt oh-so-bad when I was showering today.

A Little Pick-Me-Up

Whenever I really start getting down on myself (my body, my hair, my personal hygiene...the last one was a joke), all I have to do it look around and I instantly feel better. I always hated going to the beach, thinking I didn't belong in a bathing suit. Then I started looking around and realized everyone does it, so I am fine.

Today my eyes have been opened up to something truly entertaining....www.peopleofwalmart.com. No joke. You need a good laugh? Had a bad day? Head over to this sight and click on "photos" at the top of the page. You will INSTANTLY feel better about yourself. And, you will be laughing so hard that a little pee might come out!

Wordless Wednesday


This is an actual package of cheese I bought the other day...that I apparently have to look for bones in! So far no bones...as for blueberries in cheese, I am liking it!

The Hoarder

You may not know it by looking around my house, but I am a hoarder. I am a clothes/shoes/accessories hoarder. Seriously. I have things in my closet from high school. Given that I left that place more than a decade ago, it is probably about time to let those things go as well! Now I do agree that there are timeless pieces in your closet that you will never get rid of. But, that is not the case with most of my closet. Most of my closet falls into the category of "I might need to wear it again someday". And some of those things don't even fit me well. So, I have come up with a plan.

I have decided to wear thru my closet. I am going to wear every piece of clothing, every shoe, every accessory. If I don't love it when I am wearing it, it is time for it to move on from my closet. If I don't like how it fits, it is gone. If its cute, but I am just not going to wear it, its gone. Honestly, it is time. Almost half my wardrobe are professional clothes that I haven't put on in almost 3 years. Sure they carry great memories (like the sweater that I seemed to wear to work whenever we were taking pictures), but it is time for someone else to make memories in them...this last statement shows just how MESSED UP IN THE HEAD...um, I mean, emotionally attached I am to my closet!

I need to be practical. I need to stop hoarding. Speaking of which, anyone in the market for some new-to-them clothes?!?

Why Hello there Nice Day!

After Connor giving us a run for our money a couple days this week, the weekend came and he gave us a reprieve. He seemed in a great mood virtually every waking moment. It was definitely one of those blissful weekends that makes everyone want to be parents!

With some nice weather to be had on Saturday, we took Connor to the park. He even went down the "big kid" slide! Sure, we had to lay him down so he didn't fall, but I am pretty sure he enjoyed himself. He didn't smile while going down the slide, but would be all smiles at the end. Also, he got to go on the swings again. Ian pushed him much higher than I did before. He was laughing like crazy though. It was super cute.

When looking at the pictures, try to not be jealous of how adorable my kid is!

Little dare devil...only holding on with one hand!





Misfit

I was raised in the church...like literally spent my childhood years within the four walls of a church. Church was like second nature to me. I knew to eat the leftover communion crackers for snacks and that if I said I wanted to "help" the usher, I could sit on the back row. I knew everyone in the church and everyone knew me. It was like a second home to me. I felt completely comfortable there. It was where my friends were...I had more church friends than school friends. I never questioned going to church. I liked going. I felt like I belonged.

Then, the older I got, the less comfortable I felt. I started to notice church was a bit like a competition to people. People seeing who could be the most spiritual, who could give the most money, who could volunteer the most time. The more this happened, the more out of place I felt. The more I realized that many pastors don't even realize that life exists for most people outside the four walls of the church. If I wasn't volunteering enough time at church, involved in enough "extracurricular activities" (i.e. bible studies, extra services, etc), or giving enough money, then I wasn't in the "inner circle". And all the more, I didn't fit in. I am the person who cusses every once in a while and enjoys the odd beer. And sometimes I like to sleep in rather than go to church (I know what you are thinking...SINNER!) I by no means am perfect, but felt like who I was wasn't acceptable for the church. Many of my friends weren't christians and the church seemed to have a problem with this.

Going to church became a chore. And the reason I continued to go? Because I love God and I thought it was what I was supposed to do. So, week after week, I drug my butt to a place I knew so well, yet felt like I didn't belong. I felt like a fraud there...like I wasn't christian enough. I felt like I couldn't even trust most christians. After all, I didn't want my prayer request to be the latest gossip, which it so often is.

This has gone on for years, many a years. We have gone to some great churches during this time, but it didn't help in making me feel like I fit in. My christian circle was made up of friends who didn't go to the same church as I. In fact, many of them faced the same dilemma as I did...feeling like a misfit within the church, within the very place we should feel most welcome, most at home. But, I had friends I could count on. People I could call to pray for me or just to talk. They were real friends. And to me, the church was not real at all.

All this has begun to change for me recently. When Ian and I moved to Aberdeen, we obviously had to find a new church. And this church, like all the others, isn't perfect. But, there is something different about it. Something I can't explain. I feel like I fit in. I feel like the people aren't trying to put on a show. They aren't acting like they are perfect. Everyone hangs out together after the service (and there is like 300 people in one service). We have been able to meet friends and talk to people. And I am now at the point that I actually want to go to church. There is joy in my heart about it. I feel cared about.

This has taught me a lesson. Church isn't about who is preaching, what they are preaching about, how good the worship is, etc. It is about the people. It is about being surrounded by people who want you to succeed. People who will encourage you when you have had a crappy week. People who you may not have anything in common with, but will give you a hug and genuinely ask how you are doing.

A couple weeks ago, I got a phone call from the pastor's wife. She just called to see how we were doing. In all my years of going to church, this has never happened to me. No one from my church (pastor's wife or other) has ever called to see how I am doing. It warmed my heart. Just like everyone else out there, I want to feel like I belong. I want to feel like someone cares about me (someone in the church, not just my friends and family), like someone has my back. I am finally getting to that place and it feels right.

A Day in the Park

When it is sunny in Scotland, no matter the temp, everyone heads outdoors. Yesterday was no exception. With it hitting the high 50's, it was by all accounts a nice spring day here in Scotland. So, Connor and I headed to the park.

Given that he can pretty much sit up on his own now, I thought it was time to try out the swings. Honestly, I don't even know if Connor noticed he was in a swing or even noticed that he was moving. He was much more into all the other kids in the park. Anytime a little person gets near him, he stares at them and smiles. I have a feeling he is going to be quite the sociable tyke!



Staring at the little girl next to him...




The only photo I got of him sitting in the grass not grabbing his shoes! He is SO into them!

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